In May 1487, a boy of about ten named Lambert Simnel was crowned “King Edward VI” in Christ Church Cathedral, Dublin. He had been trained by a priest, Richard Simon, to impersonate Edward, Earl of Warwick — the teenage nephew of Richard III and the strongest surviving Yorkist claimant.
The real Earl of Warwick was in the Tower of London. He had been there, under guard, since he was a child.
The Horror
Backed by Margaret of York and other exiled Yorkists, an army of perhaps 8,000 men — Irish levies and German mercenaries — crossed to England and marched inland. On 16 June 1487, at the Battle of Stoke Field, Henry VII smashed them. The fighting was brutal; thousands were killed and almost every senior Yorkist leader died on the field.
Lambert Simnel was captured and brought before the King. Henry now had a choice: execute a ten‑year‑old boy who had worn a crown in a cathedral, and risk creating a Yorkist martyr, or do something altogether colder.
He pardoned him. He publicly dismissed Simnel as a “harmless lad” who had been used by ambitious men, and put him to work as a scullion in the royal kitchens.
A boy who had been crowned in Dublin now turned spits at court. Every noble who passed through the great kitchens knew exactly who he was. That was the point. The dynastic threat wasn’t just neutralised — it was made ridiculous. You cannot rally an army behind a boy carrying firewood.
Simnel was eventually promoted to the position of falconer — a skilled, trusted post. Records suggest he lived into the 1520s or 1530s and never made another claim. He accepted the kitchen, and the kitchen saved his life.
Five years later, another pretender, Perkin Warbeck, appeared, claiming to be Richard, Duke of York, one of the Princes in the Tower. Henry showed him a period of mercy as well. Warbeck tried to escape; he was recaptured and hanged at Tyburn in 1499. On the same day, the real Earl of Warwick — the boy Simnel had impersonated — was taken from the Tower and beheaded on Tower Hill after a dubious treason charge. He had spent about fourteen years as a state prisoner. His only real crime was being born with the wrong bloodline.
The fake earl got the kitchen. The second fake prince got the rope. The real earl got the axe. Lambert Simnel outlived them all by decades.
The Modern Relic
The great kitchens at Hampton Court Palace — the largest surviving Tudor kitchens in England — fed around 600 people twice a day in Henry VIII’s time. Stand there among the hearths, spits and smoke and imagine a boy who had once worn a crown working here, anonymous in linen, turning meat over the fire while everyone around him knew exactly who he used to be. He may have been the luckiest failed king in English history — because Henry VII understood that a living joke is safer than a dead martyr.
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